Funny Quotes

I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.
- Winston Churchill

I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own.
- Les Dawson

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.
- Mark Twain

It is easier to fight for principles than to live up to them.
- Alfred Adler

Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.
- John Lehman

A girl phoned me the other day and said - come on over, there's nobody home. I went over. Nobody was home.
- Anonymous Author

Half of the people in the world are below average.
- Anonymous Author

I can resist everything except temptation.
- Oscar Wilde

Never insult an alligator until after you have crossed the river.
- Cordel Hull

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Oscar Wilde